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User blog:The Flatwoods Monster/The Midnight Society vs Children of the Corn - Epic Rap Battles of Horror Season 4
I now call this meeting of the Midnight Society to an official beginning... What’s that you say? Oh fuck off it’s Midnight somewhere right now. So I heard you like handicap battles. How about a fuckin 6v1. Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of Epic Rap Battles of Horror. Today’s battle was suggested by Dragon and it’s been backed up by a few people since then. It features members of the original Midnight Society, Gary, Kristen, Kiki, Betty-Ann, David, and Eric rapping against cultist leader of the Children of the Corn, Isaac Chroner. The main connection here I think is that they’re both groups of kids who come together in meetings to tell stories but for polar opposite reasons. The Midnight Society does it to tell scary stories because they have something in common, which is their enjoyment of the dark (no seriously I’m taking this straight from the dialogue from the first episode, shit’s cheesy as fuck) while the Children of the Corn do it to fuel their fanatical obsession with their satanist religion. A bigger part of the connection is contrast I think. This battle probably has the most contrast out of any match-up I’ve done before lmao. Interesting to note that while I originally was going to do this suggestion solely for using the Midnight Society, the research I did on the Children of the Corn made me like them a lot more so it’s not hopefully not one sided like it would have been. Anyways enjoy. This is the first time I’ve added onto my shitty storyline without having someone else look it over first so that’s probably why it sucks. Opening “You think she’ll be here?” “It’s our best bet. Where else would you find a group of creepy murderer children?” Two men stop their freshly stolen Impala and park a decent distance from the opening of a large cornfield. There was what appeared to be a crop-circle-like imprint in the middle of the vegetation, a large gathering of children coming together in the middle. They were huddling around a large cross, made of bulky, sown-together corn stalks - an adult man hangs from the top. “This does not look good.” Meanwhile, somewhere else “I now declare this meeting of the Midnight Society, started. Today, we have a new member to welcome.” A boy is walked in and sat down on one of the logs. He wears a paper bag over his head, as traditional for new members. “Our member today is brought to us from David. David, please introduce him.” “This is my friend, Frank. He’s a good guy-” “That doesn’t matter. Can he tell a good story?” “Where the fuck am I? Who are you people?” The entire group was taken aback by this, as a short silence befell the group. “David…” “Frank what the hell man” “Who the fuck is Frank?” David pulled the paper bag off of who he thought was his friend, revealing a young boy wearing a farmer's hat “Oh shit you’re not Frank.” “Who did you just bring to our site?” “Heathens! I shall have you skewered for my capture! Don’t you know who I am?” “...” “...” “No.” “I am Isaac! Leader of the Children of the Corn, right hand servant of He Who Walks Behind The Rows!” “You brought a CULT LEADER to our site?” “Well shit I’m sorry I thought he was someone else!” “How do you plead of these offenses?” The Midnight Society falls silent as Isaac pulls out a sickle. Gary stands up. “New plan, guys. I’ll tell the story this time.” The backgrounds begin to separate into a cornfield and the forest. Four soulless looking children erupt from the corn rows behind Isaac, among them, his assistant, Malachi. Beat: My Ego is Big Pt 3 Announcer EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HORROR! VS! BEGIN! The Battle 'Gary, Kristen, Kiki, Betty-Ann, David, Eric:' Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, '' I call this story, “The Tale of the Outcast’s Terrible Rhyming Schemes” This psychopathic, hallucinogenic, manic-depressive tyke won’t bite Despite having every illness I can recite, Isaac still can't be sick on the mic This mopey bloke’s got no hope, living in his parentless utopia Send this dolt back to his cult, left him with some serious scotophobia He'd better turn Tale 'fore he's a Dead Man, our flows will so violently drown This stubborn southern sucker who makes Zeebo look like less of a clown We come up with stories twice as gory as your lore and twice as disturbing On the fly, and by the end of this tale, Isaac won’t be Returning It's surprising, being a member of maniacs who take people apart That someone with such a black heart is still Afraid of the Dark'' 'Isaac:' Outlanders! Typically I’d spare no time to engage in your petty strife, But lo and Behold! A dream from Christ did come to me in the night! What Hath the lord commandeth? Reject their flows like Corn Rows! A thousand deaths for defying me, each slightly more painful than watching their show! Judgement Day is apon thee, all you can do is scream as I take up my sword, And spill the blood of this horrible horny hoard of horror whores (Praise the Lord!) So Follow the Leader. You bunch of bleeders are our next feeders, (Let us Pray!) Easily slayed. By the end of the day, they’ll just claim that they all “moved away” (He’s scary…) And as for Gary, I’ll have him torn apart and turned into sod, Why mess with my squad when Mr. Rod is suing you for identity fraud? (Praise God!) Servants should have stayed Silent! Now they’re condemned to Isaac’s revenge, So fuck outta here and get bent! You don’t get a second chance to repent! (Amen!) 'Gary, David and Eric:' His flow was no less flawed and wrong than that of the Hell itself His motives crooked - fires just won’t ignite and not even magic dust could help And your irrational fear of outsiders? I’ve heard of that, they call it a racist Your Children-of-the-Corny views of creation drive you to enslavement, These woeful locals are anti-social, and that’s an understatement, I bet it’s because little Isaac's been too Binded to his mother's basement 'Malachi:' Well I- We tire of your talk, preacher. What?! Malachai’s the guy to bring the real fears Sorry Isaac, but I’ll take this one. Your services are no longer required here. (Two members of the cult show up and drag Isaac off-screen, towards the cross) Eric’s just too generic, more unnoticed than when your show met its end And you only show a trend of slower friends named Gary on Nickelodeon See this Door Unlocks, a Crimson Clown gets beat down and pushes up daisies So use your Silver Sight to see even your colleagues know your stories been sucking lately You may have survived Jason, but better bring Frank in when facing my rapping, Because your attacking's more embarrassing than your cheesey child-acting 'Kiki, Betty-Ann and Kristen:' Make us scream? The horror hunting team wishes you sweet dreams, Candied lines to make you Pop when they see The Children of the Corn got creamed Acting big, but you’re just mini, yo, fighting dirtier than the Stig for show We'll drop you and your family to the grave, faster than your movies went to video You’re no King when I’m the Queen, thus I willingly defy you Your rapping tactics no less uglier than - What the fuck is right behind you?! 'Malachi:' Ha! Like I'll fall for that. Don’t try to fake me out when you’ve had enough So take your place upon the cross! You’re merely- OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK (Isaac reappears behind Malachi, pouncing on him and biting into his shoulder. He resurfaces, this time with bloody handprints smeared among his chest.) 'Possessed Isaac:' Oh, NOW you’re in a Cruci-Fix! My followers will have you seized and punished! God Came To Me! To smite these sluts and their boyfriends is his Divine Judgement! So How About a Smile? It brings grins to my win to know that I’M your killer! Destroy what little existence you have! Try and get THAT shit past the filters! It's Harvesting season! And for the reason of the beatings of these treasonous hoes, I now declare this meeting of the Midnight Society CLOSED. (Praise God! Praise the Lord!) Announcer: WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HORROR! Ending Isaac broke down onto the floor, laughing maniacally. His followers shuffled uncomfortably before backing away into the corn fields. Isaac’s eyes burned a bright red, his hands, still bleeding from the cuts, reaching forward for the Midnight Society. He eventually fully collapsed, slowly dragging his way towards the six person horror crew. The kids backed away slowly, as Gary tripped over the log behind him. They struggled to get him back on his feet as Isaac continued to push his way through the stalks. Then, in a sudden flash of light, the entire country side exploded. The corn field burned a bright white and red, flames shooting out in all directions, as the sound of children cultists screaming could be heard all throughout - and in the middle of it all, an ignited block of firewood. Gary, Kiki, Betty-Ann, David, and Eric all quickly shot a look in Kristen's direction. “I panicked, okay?” The group ran back out into the woods, as Gary grabbed a bucket of water and doused the campfire. … In the distance, two men are overlooking the scene. Fire spits into the air as the gigantic cornfield is quickly devoured by flames, the sound of crazed laughter echoing through the countryside. “...” “Well shit.” “...” “...” “Think we should help them?” “...” “No.” Outro Who won? Children of the Corn The Midnight Society What battle needs another round in S5? Sinister vs Insidious Skin Taker vs Buffalo Bill Edward Scissorhands vs Sweeney Todd Other (pls specify) None HINT DEDUCTION: Tail - Midnight Society meeting begins with, "I call this... the Tale of the ______." Basically, tail = tale. This was by far the dumbest hint Gary the Snail - As mentioned in the lyrics by Malachai, Gary the Snail shares a name with Gary of the Midnight Society, as well as both being characters on Nickolodean Fran Bow + Cat - The cat that Fran Bow is holding's name is Mr. Midnight. Yea I think you can figure out the rest from there. The Colonel tastes best candied - Colonel = Kernal, which comes from Corn. Candy Corn is a Halloween candy. HINT TO THE NEXT BATTLE: Category:Blog posts